Friday, April 23, 2010
"Must Have Cheeks with Pinkish Hue"
Ever see that Seinfeld episode? Jerry and Elaine were trying to set George up on a blind date. George let go a litany of questions about this girl, most pertaining to her physical features ... even to the extent of asking if she has soft cheeks with a pinkish hue!
If you are friends with us on Facebook, you may have seen some recent polls and chatter about how much of your decision to date someone is based on looks vs. personality/character. It seems the overwhelming response is that although the latter are very important, most people base their decisions on their first impression and there must be "chemistry." I always thought chemistry is that feeling of attraction, attachment and extreme interest in each other, but it seems a lot of folks were referring to appearance.
We all have an image in our head of what the perfect mate should look like. The way this is formed is through millions of images we've seen over a lifetime, not all of which was good information. Unfortunately, the longer a person stays single, the more this image is hardwired into their conscious minds to the point of becoming a dealbreaker.
Take for instance one mentoring client we were working with this week. We were rather amazed at one dealbreaker which had to do with physical appearance. He was being encouraged to befriend a woman who seemed to have all of the other qualities he was looking for.
I was discussing this peculiarity with my husband of 25 years over dinner. Always having known him to be a very visual man, I was shocked to find that I wasn't really his usual "type." LOL ... but he emphatically stated that people could be missing out on the sweetest, kindest person with a sparkling smile, smell and personality based solely on a picture. He went on to say "You have to meet someone in person." We agreed that as long as a prospective match is not unattractive to you, then you should give him/her serious consideration, given that the other qualities are favorable. Studies report that a spouse will rate his mate as more attractive than the general public would rate him/her. This is because he/she sees them as beautiful from the inside out.
But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7
Hope all of your connections are beautiful inside and out!