Thursday, February 18, 2010

Tips for Writing your Bio, Dealmakers & Dealbreakers


Many members struggle with what to write on their bio, and the all-important dealmakers and dealbreakers. These are good questions because your connections will take a good look at what you write. Here are a few suggestions:

Dealmakers/breakers:
Yes, they can be the same, such as a dealbreaker might be smoking, and a dealbreaker is someone who doesn't smoke. We suggest making the best use of this opportunity to express yourself. Don't reiterate one point unless you feel very strongly about it. Instead, state 9 or 10 different characteristics that you'd like to see or refuse to deal with in a connection. Here are some great ones we've seen:

Breakers :(
-Disrespect
-Controlling
-Financial instability
-No desire to have children
-Bad habits
-Selfish
-Secrecy/deceitful


Makers :)
-Cheerful disposition/sense of humor
-Active in church/loves the Lord
-Integrity/honesty
-Compassionate/gentle spirit
-A family person
-Possesses leadership qualities
-Affectionate
-Authentic/sincere

Now about the bio. It can be as short or as long as you like. (Caution: there is a timer on each page. If you want to spend time working on your bio, remember to save frequently, or write the document in another program, cut and paste it in your Questionnaire.) This is also a great place to further expound on your brief answers on the Questionnaire. For instance, you can explain your stance on whether you want to have children or not. Also, almost everyone loves a sense of humor and someone who is authentic, so let your true self shine! We recommend that you employ the help of a friend or sibling to discuss your bio and read it over. Also, spell check is always a good idea :)

Ladies: We've heard that men aren't typically big readers, so it would be wise to state the most important qualities in the first paragraph. Also, they like women who take care of themselves, so if you take special care of your body, how you eat, etc., don't be afraid to say so! We have also found that men are sensitive to financial issues, so stating something like "financial provider" can send them packing. Of course, if this is very important to you, feel free to say so. I also feel inclined to mention that it is more important to post your recent photos than to spend a lot of time writing your bio. Men are visual, even Christian men. God made them that way for a reason, so we might as well accept that fact and "give the people what they want!"

Gentlemen:
Remember that women react to how you make them feel. Here is where you want to write about your softer side. If you love children, deep conversations, are a good listener and caregiver, let them know. Also, most Christian women are seeking a spiritual leader, so if your walk with Christ is solid, you may explain how your faith is played out in your daily life.

Want to read some sample bio's? Check out the Single Spotlight by clicking here. These are snippets taken from what members wrote. As always, don't give away any personal or identifying information, such as where you live or work.

~Linda

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