Compatibility Matching ? - Look Again

I'm just going to start this with three words - we're NOT eharmony. It's funny how people just assume every system is set up the same. Here's a typical email. "Why are you sending me people who don't have the same level of education that I have? I only want to date someone who has a bachelor's degree or more." Granted, I attest that I don't always read the instruction manual either, but it would be wonderful if everyone would read our matching process and method before assuming we're like the above-mentioned site.

Don't get me wrong, the planning process behind our matching system was not a haphazard - "well, let's just throw everyone together and see what happens" like a lot of open browsing systems. In the beginning, we were all set up to match people by compatibility, but there was a wrench thrown into this plan... We had spent countless hours researching other sites, talking with psychologists, mathematicians, statisticians, and business experts across the country and here's the scoop. (By the way, you might want to sit down.) Compatibility matching systems are somewhat bogus! And this is why - the statisticians we contacted told us they can match people on the basis of their likes and dislikes and commonalities. Okay, this sounds good. We've all heard compatibility promoted on the commercials. ... Uh oh! Then we talked with the psychologists. Put on the brakes, hold the presses, stop the website production! Drs. Tom and Bev Rodgers dropped a bombshell. They said it is not necessarily a good thing to put people together with all the same common interests and behaviors. Here's their example. "Do you really want a shy person matched with another shy person?" They explained that it is sometimes best that two people have opposite strengths which promote growth in each other. For instance, if you are a so-so golfer seeking a better score, do you want to play with someone who is the same or worse ability as yourself or someone who's a little better? It's pretty obvious that we can learn and improve from someone who is a little more advanced.

So, a red flag there, but here comes part 2 of of the dilemma. The statisticians couldn't give us the algorithm we were looking for. They told us it was impossible for them to measure chemistry. Compatibility could be measured to some degree on paper, but these systems leave out one of the most important aspects of a good match - chemistry. They said there is no algorithm that could measure whether two people would actually be attracted to one another once they meet.

So, here comes the hard part. What now? The system was almost formulated and ready to be set up. But, how do we match people on compatibility and give people the "illusion" that their connections are someone we are suggesting as a possible mate? We have had some agonizing decision to make at Cache', but this one was right at the top of the heap. After dumping the emotional aspect and anguish, we got down to... what are the facts? And after a thorough examination of the research, there is one tried-and-true formula that works every time - two people connect, meet and make a decision for themselves about who "strikes their fancy."

Based on this information, we formed our system on this philosophy:
1.) bringing people together as like-minded believers, 2.) equipping singles to make good, informed, "healthy" decisions for themselves.

Sounds simple? We don't take it lightly... every aspect of Cache' Connections incorporates this philosophy by providing expert advice through the website and the events... and it's working.
Here's an example of an email to confirm this method, "Kim and Linda, I wanted to thank you for obeying Jesus by creating Cache Connections. I enjoyed the event and meeting you at First Baptist Atlanta on July 31^st. Attending the event and joining your organization was the first step and major breakthrough for the spirit of fear to be broken and removed from my life. You see, I was afraid to go or do anything by myself. I was bitter and angry with God about being single for so long and even now at the age of 51. However, as I go forth doing things alone and enjoying life,staying in His Word, God will be able to use me for His purpose and plans thatHe has for me because I’m no longer held hostage at home, bitter or angry. Thank you for being a part of this major deliverance in my life. Drs Tom and Beverly Rodgers were awesome. I’m so glad they presented the challenge about the man’s role as the leader/hunter and intentional dating. Emphasizing that it is better to obey God. I purchased both of their books. Kim and Linda thank you again. May God continue to bless and keep you. May His face shine upon you continuously as you stand boldly spreading and keeping the integrity of the Gospel of Jesus. God bless you both. I am forever grateful." Kimberly, Atlanta, GA

Hopefully this will help dispel some of those preconceived notions. We'll explain more about our expert advice later.

Kim