The Singlehood Phenomenon, Part 9

Why aren't singles getting married? Reason No. 9: An Unbalanced Focus on Career. Many women are finding themselves entering their 40's still single and childless, yet very successful and fulfilled in their careers. The trouble is they are doing such a good job at their jobs that they have little room for anything else. Likewise, examples are given of men who are so involved in their careers and ministry that they don't feel there is room to add a wife and family. In taking a deeper look into their lives, however, it is often found that there are doubts and fears that are driving them so far away from seeking a godly relationship. As in so many aspects of life, a healthy balance is key. Three single counseling patients were found to have the following reasons for having an unhealthy focus on careers: 1) their careers were something they could control. 2) they were more successful at their careers than they were at love (they put their energy into areas where they did well in order to feel good about themselves). 3) their careers were something they could count on to reward them (there are no guarantees in the business of love) There is an interesting report of one client who was heavily involved in ministry and had a tendency "puff himself up" to such a level that it was a turnoff for woman. So, what about you? Are you using your career to compensate for loneliness or to hide your painful feelings of past hurts?